Grief much like the death process is a sacred passage that is deserving of respectful care and attention. It is an acknowledgment of something that has ended and we enter into a mourning period to pay our respects for that loss. It is the magnitude of the love we have for the departed that creates such intense mourning. Grief is an opportunity for our souls to engage in a transformational process that has an ability to take us into the vulnerable landscape of our lives where we are met with our innermost fears about life and the nature of life that exist around us. Yet to enter into that place of deep reverence with your emotions, pain, loss, and heartache is a very spiritual place to be as you maneuvering into a brand new terrain of your life.

 

The journey on the new terrain is the toughest part, one is met with confusion, darkness, inability to see with clarity, denial, anger, depression, and so many more. Grief has many faces that will show itself to us, pain, sorrow, despair, guilt, confusion, darkness, heartbrokenness, etc. Grief can be a bear clawing wildly to regain some semblance and normalcy of life after an intense loss. The need to return to a life we once knew is strong. Like death, grief and the counterparts that comes with it are not sufficiently addressed in today's society. For most, grief is an unpleasant side effect of loss we rather not deal with and busyness is a favored friend to avoid the uneasiness that is felt. Yet taking the path of entering through rather than taking shortcuts will reap the most inner growth and healing. Our hearts will always grieve the loss but our transformation we undergo can be done with intention and awareness.

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Grief

• Draws trauma,

• Anxiety and panic attacks 

• Body aches and pains that seem scary  

• Confusion 

• Depression

• Feelings of insecurity

• Loss of confidence in self and life

• Can make you feel as if you're waiting for the other shoe to drop

• Sleeplessness

• Can bring up old wounds, anger, and guilt.

 

As a grief doula we partner with you to create a care package based on your current needs to help you heal and process in your own authentic way. It is a time for great self care, tenderness, and a moving gently into the unknown.

 

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Intentional Grieving

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While grief can make an unexpected appearance in our lives the way it did for me when my husband suddenly died, I found myself left with an ache and void so huge that nothing, no words and images could fill that space that would make the aching less. The only available consolation I had was to enter into that place were the piercing had taken place and be with my pain. I call this intentional grieving. 

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Intentional grieving is 

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• Embarking on a journey of courage to open the wounded self to feel the shape, and texture of grief.

• Befriending your tears, brokenness, confusion, on the long journey ahead. 

• Spirit calling us to enter into that new places we've yet to travel

• Making room within that new territory to explore its dimension however uncomfortable it may be.

• Choosing to experience grief with conscious awareness courageously

• Shows us the new road ahead by trusting the dark season to lead us to light and clarity

• Trusting this season of change, uncertainty, and  sorrow to transform your life.  

• Living with the guidance of Divine of spirit while you let go of the outcome.

• Being patience with the journey and taking no shortcuts to the healing process.  

• Choosing not to be a victim of grief but raising our consciousness that we can grieve openly with dignity honoring this sacred experience.  

• A bold courageous act to step into your pain, fears, and embracing the endings that is also your beginning. 

 

While the process of grief isn't linear, it moves in its own organic way and we can still make room for our old skin to shed so the new can eventually when the time is right to come forward. We know that everyone experiences grief differently because we are all complex beings from various life experiences and belief systems. The important piece to remember as you wade through the journey is to take it day by day, moment by moment, tear by tear, being kind and compassionate during difficult bouts and to remain as open and honest about what you're feeling and to invite the Divine with you on the journey as a sacred companion.

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